Friday, March 22, 2013

90 DAYS

Well, it's been 90 days since Tom passed away.  Sometimes I wonder if anyone remembers the date.  Everyone asks how I'm doing and on the outside, I'm doing fine.  On the inside, I'm mostly fine.  The weight of sadness and loss is extremely heavy.  I'm not sure you would believe some of the things that go through my mind sometimes.  Wonderful memories, bad memories, horrible memories . . . all in a flash and often in the same few seconds.  I believe my suffering and the suffering of others Tom's life touched is not nearly as bad as the suffering Tom endured.  It continues to be comforting that his suffering is over.  I wish I didn't think about it as often as I do.  However, I've recalled many great memories too and it's getting easier to grab a hold of those when I'm sad.  

I've tried to keep busy.  I've been to Georgia to shop for antiques with Tom's sisters and our nieces.  I went to Arizona to see Tom's aunt, uncle and cousins - shopping, hiking and a day at the spa.  The following weekend I went to Gatlinburg with my Spiritual Leadership Team and did some hiking in 5" of snow!  I went home to Memphis to do the family thing and spent a wonderful "bonus" evening with my girlfriends.  I haven't laughed that much in so long!  There are a few other trips in the works as well - it's nice to get out and about.  I wish Tom were here so I could tell him all about them but . . . he knows!

Of course, the puppies consume most of my time at home and I love having them to come home to.  There are many things still to do - right now I am preparing for the first garage sale (I think it will take more than one to "purge" all of our "stuff").  There are projects going on at the house - it is fun, most of the time.  The electric driveway gate is in and it is wonderful not having to get in and out of the car to open and close it!  Next up is a master bath renovation.  I was using the larger guest bath and closet(s) upstairs and our master bath and closet are just not cutting it for me!  I do like not having to run up and down the stairs all the time.  If I ever get another house, it will be one level!  Mom, you were right!

 I love just hanging out at home - there is so much to do there.  I go workout at the Y a few times a week.  Hopefully this cold weather will be out of here soon.  The Tuscany Trio is ready to start riding again.  No big biking trips planned this year - just some local stuff, but you never know!

My personal e-mail address is changing.  It is burnetj0617@gmail.com

Feel free to drop me a note!

Thank you for your continued thoughts and prayers.